Going Home

Today I RSVP'd for a friend's wedding. I went to High School with him ... so it's been a while since we've seen each other, and we're both really excited! It's interesting, because my parents moved not long after I moved to college at 18 ... so "home" has been a very fluid concept for me for the past 11 years (and if you're quick with math you now know 1. exactly how old I am and 2. what year I graduated from HS :)!). And once I broke up with my high school boyfriend I never went back ... that would be 10 years ago.

Ten years is a long time. I've actually always envied people who have a home town. A place where you grew up from kindergarten on and years later still know everyone. I love that we moved a lot and I got to meet a lot of new people - it really shaped who I am - which is priceless. But sometimes, when people talk about a hometown I have a longing for that as well.

Elizabeth, Colorado is where I went to high school and the last place I lived at home full time. That was the last place that was "home" before Jeff and I made our own home here in Utah. I didn't go "home" during college ... I went to my parent's house. Which was always wonderful ... I just didn't have any other connection to any of those places that always left me feeling a bit like I was floating somehow.

I didn't stay super connected with many people from high school past my first couple of years of college. I just didn't hold on. And in a lot of ways that makes me really sad ... I had some really great friends. And I've reconnected with a few over the last year, which has been really nice. Maybe in some way I feel like I need to go home and reconnect before I move into my 30s. (I'm not sure why, that just sounds sort of poetic doesn't it?!)

Jeff is really excited to see where I went to high school, where we lived, and meet a few people. I've contacted a couple of people, and to hear their excitement over getting to see one another has been so wonderful ... like I mattered to them the same way they mattered to me.

Every time I hear the Bon Jovi song "Who Says You Can't Go Home?" it reminds me of me ... like just because I didn't still have a physical house there I tried to distance myself, or maybe I just lost the connection.

I spent 20 years trying to get out of this place
I was looking for something I couldn't replace
I was running away from the only thing I've ever known
Like a blind dog without a bone
I was a gypsy lost in the twilight zone
I hijacked a rainbow and crashed into a pot of gold
I been there, done thatand I ain't lookin' back on the seeds I've sown,
Saving dimes, spending too much time on the telephone
Who says you can't go home

[Chorus]
Who says you can't go home
There's only one place they call me one of their own
Just a hometown boy, born a rolling stone, who says you can't go home
Who says you can't go back, been all around the world and as a matter of fact
There's only one place left I want to go, who says you can't go home
It's alright, it's alright, it's alright, it's alright, its alright

I went as far as I could, I tried to find a new face
There isn't one of these lines that I would erase
I lived a million miles of memories on that road
With every step I take I know that I'm not alone
You take the home from the boy, but not the boy from his home
These are my streets, the only life I've ever known,
who says you can't go home

[Chorus]

I been there, done thatand I ain't looking that
It's been a long long road
Feels like I never left, that's how the story goes

It doesn't matter where you are, it doesn't matter where you go
If it's a million miles aways or just a mile up the road
Take it in, take it with you when you go,
who says you can't go home

[Chorus]

It's alright, it's alright, it's alright, it's alright, its alright
Who says you can't go home

Here's to going to one of my many "homes!"

(Lyrics from here.)